“In this season of deep snow, I want to ask people to take great care not to have any accidents in removing snow from roofs.” -from the Emperor of Japan


His Majesty the Emperor’s New Year Thoughts for 2014

A third winter since the Great East Japan Earthquake has come around. At the dawn of the new year, my heart once again goes out to the afflicted people, those who cannot return to the places they used to live because of radioactive contamination and those who have to spend the cold harsh winter in temporary housing.

Last year, too, many people were confronted with various difficulties and I am sure they faced many hardships. In this new year, it is my hope that the people of Japan not forget the plight of those who are facing hardships and try to share even a little of their burden, and help and comfort one another at all times. I also hope that they will work together with the people of the world in pursuit of peace and do their utmost to build a better tomorrow.

In this season of deep snow, I want to ask people to take great care not to have any accidents in removing snow from roofs.

It is my hope that the new year will bring happiness to the people of Japan and the people around the world.

(via Mainichi newspaper)

A Tokyo reporter for a major US newspaper wonders whether the snow on the roofs advice is actually a metaphor.

It’s Johnny’s World, and we’re just passing through


Johnny’s, the reclusive octogenarian mastermind of generations of Japanese boy bands, clearly owns the giant billboards over Shibuya Crossing, if not the entire world. Faced with so much early teen male beauty, we can only hurry past this wall of complex and poofie helmet hair.

Flamboyant straight men are what I love the most about Japan

Until recently, Japanese gays seemed content to fade into the background: a performance of normality bordering on boring. Not so for the straight men of Japan, who are truly some of the world’s most magnificent peacocks.

I love the attention to detail: the rolled up hem has a fruit pattern, zebra print can be fused with jungle print, hair fried and stiff, skin is kept eerily dark and flawlessly unblemished. Sitting hip-to-hip challenges no one’s masculinity.

When I feel frustrated about various aspects of a foreigner’s life in Japan, I look around the train and feel uplifted, inspired, and very much in love.

Why are the people running the world so fugly?!

This photo has *nothing* to do with Tokyo Moe. But a simple question seems crystallized in this meeting between US Secretary of Defense Robert M. Gates met with President Hu Jintao of China. One super power’s banker is meeting with the other’s gun pusher.

Why are the people running the world so fugly? Jowl to jowl, they might frighten small children with their cold hearts. The flowers are horrid. The only redeeming figure is the handsome Chinese translator. Goddess, save us now!

Japanese masturbation champion Sato Masanobu

A true erotic athlete, Sato Masanobu, won a masturbation marathon with a winning time of 9 hours, 58 minutes. He credits Tenga and its 10 varieties for their help, and also says that his family is supportive of his competition. It would have been lovely to see his family at the medal ceremonies!

Japan is currently feeling insecure with the rise of China and India, but no country tops Japan in hot-dog eating, or in male masturbation. Congratulations, team Japan!

(Thanks tipster J-son).

Tokyo’s Danny Choo Brings Dance Tooper to Singapore

Tokyo based Danny Choo, global otaku extraordinaire, brings his Dance Trooper to Singapore. The little island will never be the same. Two notable parts of this amazing dance video: wiping the sweat from his helmet, and the prominent crotch. If such flamboyant male heterosexuality spreads, world peace will surely follow.

Captain Hillary and Chelsea the Fierce

Captain Hilary and Chelsea the Fierce

Hillary Clinton and Chelsea Clinton are looking formidable at the Senator’s confirmation hearings for Secretary of State. The title (and photo) are contributions from the husband.

I am excited for Hilary and, even more so, in anticipation of Chelsea’s imminent rise to public leadership. Watch out, world!