royal family

Random Gay Tokyo life

Sublime and random Tokyo gay stories in August:

1. A gay Italian visitor to Tokyo is *shocked* at the sight of Japanese men using paper fans to cool themselves on trains and sidewalks. “In Italy, only women and fags dare use a fan.” There is nothing more satisfying than observing an Italian man surprised by another nation’s male effeminacy.

2. My new super-gay hairdresser (rare in a country where most are straight) has recently told me about his working the festival circuit with his yakuza friends carrying a portable shrine shoulder to shoulder and dressed in fundoshi (ritual male thongs), his earlier stint at a Ginza hair salon when he cut the hair of  minor royals, and advice about yankii and nudist beachs in Chiba.

A few years younger than this author, my new gay Japanese sensei is also a middle-aged competitive body builder, with distinct orange in his hair and skin tone. Did I mention that we met at Haguromo, the super-gay and sometimes yakuza-filled sento? How often can I get my short hair cut? He’s talented with hair and full of helpful stories and expressions.

3. I’ve heard that many Japanese prefer “small faces.” Just recently, a Japanese friend explained that Japanese distinguish between weak faces (うすい、薄い)and strong faces(こい、濃い). Previously I understand that these adjectives are applied to liquids like tea (literally, the concentration through quantity and steeping time) and even to food types (sort of like light and heavy).

Apparently with people, so-called weak faces have “fewer distinguishing features” or “fewer things sticking out.” Strong faces have deep set eyes, large noses, more prominent chins. This distinction is at once racial and yet pretends not to be.  I have a hard time grokking this, but will be more open to hearing about these immutable differences.

Hot or not: Kobayashi Takeru?

Kobayashi Takeru, pizza eating champion

Is he hot or not? World pizza-eating champion Kobayashi Takeru not only proudly focuses viewers’ attention on his tight stomach, but provides a rare come-hither gesture.

To review his Google Image search is to savor delinquent defiance with ever changing bleached and processed hair. Kobayashi’s riot of punk excess and competitive hedonism, his massive hot dog eating, and his all-American image making is alluring and repulsive.

So many questions arise. What is it about classic American food that lends itself so easily to who-can-eat-more contests? Can Americans not compete with Japanese in our most popular national sports? Is Kobayashi a good or bad representative of Japan. And finally, is he hot or not? What do the readers say?

Kobayashi Takeru in Alabama, winning again

You can see he charmed at least one Alabama member of the collegiate royal family.

Some other fun facts: his arch-rival is Joey Chestnut, he’s eaten 59 hot dogs in 10 minutes, and 5 and 3/4 P’zones (cross between a pizza and calzone) in 6 minutes, competitive food eating involves “jaw capacity and stomach capacity.”